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“... many offenders reported a history of sadistic behavior toward animals, such as killing, maiming, and threatening small animals. . . .” seemed to introduce him in a more conscious way to a fantasy life which occupied much of his life: “| was eight years old, having nightmares, that’s when | went off into the morbid fantasy and that’s when the death trip started. The devil was sharing my bedroom with me, he was living in the furnace. The furnace was there battling away in the corner with an eerie glow in the middle of the night.” This man later in the interview de- scribed a conscious awareness of his motive to kill: “Y knew long before | started killing that | was going to be killing, that it was going to end up like that. The fantasies were too strong. They were going on for too long and were too elaborate.” Following the first murder, the fantasy becomes reality that requires a change in the structure of the fantasy in order to repeat the crime. The same murderer tells of this fantasy development: “It was almost like a black comedy of errors, the first killings, two people, it was terrible because | made three fatal errors in the first 24 hours. | should have been busted. . . | saw how loose | was and | tightened it up and when it happened again and again | got tighter and tighter and there weren't any more slips.” Motivation operates on many levels. We are referring here to the conscious or preconscious awareness of the murderers, the structure of their fantasies, and the resultant act of murder. We use the term ‘‘precon- scious” since many of the interviews with the murderers reveal this level. The man would state he remembered having vague thoughts or was able to remember some parts of his thinking but did not have this awareness clear- ly structured in his mind. This re- sponse in subjects led to our belief that much of the motive and intent in the form of fantasies are vague and loosely formulated uni/ the murderers actually kill. With the reality of the murder, the fantasy feeds off itself and becomes more structured. As more murders are committed, the phases of the murders become more organized. Although we discuss the ‘“‘first” murder, many offenders reported a history of sadistic behavior toward ani- mals, such as killing, maiming, and threatening small animals (cats, birds, fish). In one case, the murderer, as a young boy, had acquired the nick- name “Doc,” apparently from his fondness for slitting open the stom- achs of cats and observing how far they could run before they died. One murderer connected his mur- derous acts to dismembering his sis- ter’s doll heads. ‘'! used to do my sis- ter’s dolls that way when | was a kid . just yanked the head off her Barbie dolls.” Although this offender was able to note the connection to his early violent fantasies, many offend- ers were not able to make this link. We are not discussing in this arti- cle any motives based on childhood experiences. Instead, we are referring to-a level of motivation that later in the life of the offender serves as a basis for or triggers the murder. It is at this later level of motiva- tion that the offender’s fantasy life re- flects itself in his social behavior—the line between fantasy and reality blurs. The offender may become isolated or socially aloof rather than acting on the fantasy. This social isolation perhaps helps in inhibiting his desire to act on 104 the fantasy. What these 36 men re- vealed in terms of their first murder was that something happened exter- nally to them that moved them to act out this fantasy. The key person in the fantasy— the one doing the killing, maiming, or torturing—is the perpetrator himself. Sometimes, perpetrators fantasize self-victimization, such as ordering their own evisceration, but most vic- timize others in their fantasies. Their actions are mentally rehearsed and are accompanied by emotion. The fantasy life is varied and has many dy- namics that are idiosyncratic to the murderer. A variety of factors can trigger the offender to act on his fantasy, in- cluding certain interactions between the murderer and the victim. The fol- lowing case illustrates the murderer’s recall of the triggering event of the victim trying to escape, but not of the murder: Subject: “‘We were upstairs and | was taking my clothes off. That's when she started back downstairs. As a matter of fact, that’s the only time | hit her. | caught her at the stairs.” Agent: “What happened?” Subject: She wanted to know why | hit her. | just told her to be quiet. She was complaining about what time she would get home and she said her parents would worry. She consented to sex. . . then | remembered nothing else except waking up and her dead in the bed.” Some murderers were aware of their fantasy to rape and their motive to kill. The fantasy of one juvenile who was caught after his first rape de- picted total control over women. He